As the new year begins, many of us are drawn to the familiar idea of setting resolutions—goals that promise to "improve" our lives. We often create ambitious lists of things we want to achieve: exercising every day, eating perfectly, reaching certain milestones. But too often, these resolutions come with high expectations, leaving us feeling overwhelmed and, eventually, defeated. When we fall short of meeting our own strict standards, it can feel like failure, even if we’ve made meaningful progress.
This year, I invite you to set intentions instead of resolutions—intentions that are sustainable, fulfilling, and kind to yourself. Let’s focus on the long game, rather than pushing ourselves to meet arbitrary goals that create unnecessary pressure.
The Difference Between Goals and Intentions
Goals are often specific, measurable, and time-bound. While they can be motivating, they can also create stress. For instance, "I will exercise every day in 2025" may seem inspiring at first, but what happens when you miss a day—or several? Suddenly, it feels less attainable, and you may end up feeling like you’ve failed. The rigid nature of goals can leave little room for flexibility, and in turn, can erode the sense of accomplishment that we hope to achieve.
Intentions, on the other hand, are broader, more fluid, and rooted in how you want to feel. Rather than aiming for specific outcomes, intentions are about embracing a mindset or attitude that supports growth. For example, instead of committing to "exercise every day," you might set the intention to "make healthier choices and nurture my body with movement." This intention allows for flexibility—giving you room to have both good days and not-so-good days, without the pressure of perfection.
Why Intentions Matter
Intentions focus on the journey rather than just the destination. They're not about being perfect, but about aligning yourself with what truly matters. When we focus on intentions, we’re more likely to build habits that feel fulfilling and last over time. It’s easier to show up for yourself when you remove the stress of rigid expectations and embrace a gentler approach.
Every day is a new opportunity. It doesn’t matter if yesterday didn’t go as planned—today is a fresh start, and you can begin again with kindness, not shame. It’s important to recognize that growth takes time, and progress is not always linear. The aim is not to get everything "right," but to move in a direction that feels aligned with your well-being and peace of mind.
Reframing High Standards
Many of us hold ourselves to high standards, which can be both motivating and draining. The desire to be "perfect" can quickly turn into a source of stress. Instead of aiming for an impossible ideal, try reframing your standards in a way that is kinder to yourself. When you ease up on the pressure, you’ll be able to build habits that are sustainable and nurturing.
For example, instead of setting a strict rule that your house must be spotless every day, set the intention to create spaces where you feel calm and centered. Instead of demanding a rigorous exercise routine, set the intention to find joy in movement—whether that means a walk, yoga, or dancing. The goal isn’t perfection; it’s balance and self-care.
Let Go of Comparisons: Embrace Your Unique Journey
In today’s world, social media can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy. As we scroll through curated posts, it’s easy to think everyone else is living a life full of success, happiness, and excitement—while we’re left behind, struggling to keep up. But the reality is that social media only shows the highlights, the best moments, and the carefully crafted images. What we don’t see are the behind-the-scenes struggles and the messy parts of life that are part of everyone’s journey.
It’s all too easy to compare yourself to others and feel like you're falling short. But when you stop and really reflect, you’ll realize that we are all walking our own paths, at our own pace. The journey isn’t a race. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have or what others seem to be doing better, try shifting your perspective. Celebrate the unique strengths you bring to the world and take pride in the growth you've already made.
Remember, you are not an illusion, and neither are the people you see online. We are all on different journeys, navigating our own struggles and triumphs. Let go of the comparisons, and focus instead on what makes your life meaningful and beautiful.
Self-Compassion is Key
At the heart of setting intentions is the practice of self-compassion. It’s easy to be hard on ourselves when we don’t meet our expectations, but it’s essential to treat ourselves with the same kindness we would offer a close friend. When you stumble, don’t view it as failure—see it as part of the process. Every step, every misstep, is a lesson that can guide you forward.
As you move through this year, be gentle with yourself. Recognize that you’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough. You don’t need to be perfect to be worthy of love, success, or peace. Progress takes time, and each day offers a new opportunity to try again.
Embrace this year with intention—choose paths that honor who you are, not who you think you should be. Your journey is unique, and you are enough exactly as you are. Let go of the pressure and embrace the beauty of becoming, one step at a time.